Why is this the most hated F-Word?

Feminist. Wait! Please don't stop reading. Too bad "equalitist" wasn't a word, eh? But why does that particular F-word seem to INSTANTLY repel people? Why is it such a horrible word? I think the so-called "Femi-Nazis" ruined it.

I believe women deserve the same treatment, same opportunities, and same pay for the same work, as men. Does that make me a bad person? Am I a man-hater? Or angry? Does that mean I have a bad attitude?

Why does the word “feminism” evoke so much negativity? Why does it make so many people uncomfortable? Especially when I think almost everyone should be a feminist. The rise of women, does NOT mean the fall of men!

Feminism is about equal rights for women, which I think most people support for obvious reasons, since we are all “equal”, right? I was always raised to believe none of us is better than the other, even though some people may be better at certain “tasks” than others, it doesn't mean they are better people and more deserving in any way. We are ALL human and are not given the option when we are born to choose our skin colour, sexuality, social status, nor gender. We are all human beings.

As an almost 43 year old woman, I have been victimized by men more times than I can count, starting at the age of 12, and I do think #TimesUp for any man who abuses his power, displays predatory behaviour, and assaults, harasses or bullies women. It has been going on for centuries and it needs to stop; however, I still love men, because there are a lot of incredible ones on this planet and I'm lucky to have quite a few of them in my life.

I feel it's also important to note that many men are victims of abuse by women too, but this isn't about just physical abuse. Feminism is about achieving political, economic, personal, and social equality of the sexes. Women make up 50% of the population, so shouldn't we get fair representation?

Since I started in the workforce about 30 years ago, I have been sexually assaulted (groped), harassed, and bullied by male supervisors and co-workers, on more than one occasion and at more than one company. I even had a GM try to toss bottle caps down my shirt, in front of fellow employees. And in each circumstance, when I went to my other male managers for help or guidance, I ended up being strongly encouraged to leave my job if I was so unhappy (which was not the case), and I became known as “trouble”, while the perpetrators received no repercussions for their behaviour. Does that seem right to you? Is it fair that the female victim gets HER career and reputation destroyed? And it's happened and still happening to more women than me, every single day. Just because you may not have experienced, nor witnessed it, doesn't mean it isn't true.

Men usually stick together, but women do not. I have been thrown under the bus by other female colleagues, who are trying to save their own careers, and betrayed by female lawyers and union leaders, who don't want to “rock the boat”. Why? Because in 2018, women are still not treated equally and remain afraid of speaking up. And I agree the "false accusers" are doing absolutely NOTHING to help the cause!

One of the companies where I worked had 20 women and 5 men on the payroll, but three of those men were the managers, and that's not uncommon. Men hold most of the powerful positions in the world and the term “Old Boys Club” rings true in many industries.

Why is a strong woman considered a bitch, while a strong man is considered sexy? I don't understand. I believe I'm a good, hard-working, and kind person, who deserves to be treated with the same respect as my male counterparts. Is that so wrong?

I was actually once told by a man that feminism is taking away women's femininity and attractiveness. Really? Because strong women are ugly? Because we look prettier when we're quiet? I've heard that line before, right before I got a fist to my face, but I refuse to let my past affect who I am as a person. I truly believe that in order to live, you must forgive!

I may not be a mother, but I have two nieces (ages 8 & 14), who I want to have a better life experience as a woman than me. Don't you want more for your sisters, daughters, nieces, and cousins too?

They have absolutely NO female role models right now, other than the Kardashians, who have not spent one single penny to make the world a better place. Those women take their clothes off and claim female empowerment, when it's actually the complete opposite of feminism. Young women are witnessing that the only girls/women who get attention are the ones who get naked, and what is that telling them???

Equality for women means we should be able to get the same respect and attention as men WITHOUT having to take our clothes off! Women won the right to vote over 100 years ago, to prove to men that our voices matter and we are more than housewives and baby-makers. We could become doctors, lawyers, pilots, soldiers, and anything we wanted! (Without having a husband too! Gasp!)

Meanwhile, “Playboy” underwear is being sold in local stores to teen girls, who are attending so-called “Rainbow Parties”, so boys will like them. Should we not teach our young women to aspire to become more than porn stars? Or will they be afraid to be a strong, intelligent woman because they'll be labelled a bitch? Or unattractive? Young women NEED to see more women in powerful positions and those women getting the positive attention they deserve, or nothing is going to change.

I want young women to know they are so much more important than their appearance and they have so much more to offer the world than their bodies. I want young women to know they are important, they have support, their voices are being heard, someone is listening, and they should dream big!

We, as women, NEED to support each other, instead of beating each other down, because nobody else is going to do it for us. Let's stop criticizing one another and lift each other up instead! Not just for us, but for our future female generations, because I think they're worth it.

And if you really want to hate an f-word, make it “failure”....

Sincerely,

Laura xo

The Friendly Feminist/Equalitist :)